No parent wants their kids to be spineless sheep always following the crowd, so what did you make of the recent ‘capitulation in the world’s heart’ over the Syrian exodus crisis this week?
Peer pressure can come in a variety of ways. Sometimes it can have a positive effect, discouraging bad behaviour, even an anti- bully culture. Other times it can be hurtful, like when a friend is pressured to ignore you because a group at school wants to exclude you and isolate you. Nice. Sometimes peer pressure creates positive action but with questionable motives.
It’s that third category that we have seen most recently in the news, where nations, including our own have made grand announcements about increasing refugee intakes from Syria. Now don’t get me wrong, this is a good thing. Australia has a poor record of being generous and proactive when it comes to responding to the suffering of others and their need to find refuge. Finally we might be seeing some signs of softening when it comes to refugee policy. As the Anglican Archbishop of Sydney this week stated in the SMH, we have an opportunity to be a Good Samaritan (Jesus’ parable) and not ignore the plight of thousands fleeing Syria at this time. Though technically we are not as proximate as the Good Samaritan was, the internet does in one sense bring us closer, we can and should contribute, along with the rest of the world, to ‘doing good to all people’ (Galatians 6) by assisting people in this crisis.
The plight of refugee is well known in the Bible. Israel was a bunch of refugees who fled the persecution of Egypt, but faced hostility from nations along their path to Canaan. Those nations were judged for their lack of hospitality and generosity. Jesus himself was a refugee. As a baby his mum and dad fled out of Bethlehem to Egypt after King Herod moved to wipe out all the baby boys. The social chaos caused by such tyrannical abuses of power creates enormous deficits that need to be filled by the generosity of others.
But the motivation to reach out and help shouldn’t come from peer pressure, ideally. Germany and Austria it seems started the landslide, possibly because it’s an opportunity to rebuild its post war image. Soon we were all jumping in. It was quite funny to watch really, hypocrisy. But this happens at your local school too. Some student genuinely decides to raise money for something, pretty soon everyone’s doing it and even the school starts promoting it on the school website, almost like it was their idea in the first place.
It’s a public relations exercise masking as generosity. We all do it. Who wants to be the one looking stingy? We don’t want to be left out. We don’t want to miss out on the skimming the cream off the PR machine!
My question to us all as parents is what do kids learn from this kind of peer pressure? When do you stick up for something? Only when there’s momentum behind you? Do you give up when few others seems to care? Do we only get involved with things when they’re on TV or what’s trending on the internet? How do you equip your child to have a spine and show genuine compassion? Surely that’s worthwhile isn’t mums and dads?
First, we have to set the example; mums and dads have to have a spine too. We can talk about issues in the home over dinner. Yes that means don’t watch TV while having dinner, but actually talk a little about your day. We can choose to be generous by consistent supporting of worthy causes whether it is sponsor children or some program to install wells in Africa. As world crises unfold we can discuss them and pray for them. You may even be surprised that your children want to do something practical, like make a donation or run a mufti day at school to raise money. As the kids get older, we can even show them how you can write an email to your local MP, raising issues of concern with them about such issues as our refugee policy.
I’m Stephen Shearsby, Christian Performing Artist and creator of Anton's Antics. If you’d like to book one of my shows for your next event get in contact today.
